Meditation / Mindfulness Can Change Your Relationship with Pain
If undertaken consistently over a period of time, with good support – simple mindfulness practice can help with the chronic pain of fibromyalgia. This help is different from the assistance pain medication can offer, because it employs your own resources of body, heart, breath, and mind to work directly with your felt experience of pain, your relationship with pain, rather than focusing on eradicating the physical symptoms themselves. The cultivation of mindfulness attunes you to what is strong, sane, compassionate and wise within yourself, no matter how difficult your situation may seem. Mindfulness practice can help you grow in a sense of your own resilience in the face of pain. As you become more familiar with your own embodied sense of well-being, and as you cultivate your ability to bring that well-being to the forefront, it is as though the container of your awareness grows larger.
In a worst-case scenario (and we have ALL been there!), your pain feels as big as your whole awareness. You perceive your awareness to be the size of a thimble, and the pain is a jagged stone that fills it completely, dislodging all the clear water. You feel overwhelmed, and it is impossible to imagine the pain shifting in any way. It is all that you can think about. You feel imprisoned and helpless.
After some time of regular practice with your breath, heart, body, and mind, let’s say now you perceive your awareness to be the size of a water glass. The pain is still the same jagged stone, but now – thanks to the larger glass – there is clear water around it. You’re not overwhelmed anymore – the extra space means you can observe and feel into the pain, or choose to focus on the un-painful parts of your experience.
With more experience, the container of your awareness continues to grow larger. Now it's the size of an ocean. When pain arises, you can receive it with compassion: This is what pain is like. People everywhere are experiencing pain. May I and all beings be free from pain. Your suffering feels less like a personal affront and more a part of the whole picture of being human. You are more and more aware of the parts of your experience that feel relaxed and open, and so the pain – while sometimes still intense – occurs against a backdrop of feeling basically OK in yourself and in the world.
In a worst-case scenario (and we have ALL been there!), your pain feels as big as your whole awareness. You perceive your awareness to be the size of a thimble, and the pain is a jagged stone that fills it completely, dislodging all the clear water. You feel overwhelmed, and it is impossible to imagine the pain shifting in any way. It is all that you can think about. You feel imprisoned and helpless.
After some time of regular practice with your breath, heart, body, and mind, let’s say now you perceive your awareness to be the size of a water glass. The pain is still the same jagged stone, but now – thanks to the larger glass – there is clear water around it. You’re not overwhelmed anymore – the extra space means you can observe and feel into the pain, or choose to focus on the un-painful parts of your experience.
With more experience, the container of your awareness continues to grow larger. Now it's the size of an ocean. When pain arises, you can receive it with compassion: This is what pain is like. People everywhere are experiencing pain. May I and all beings be free from pain. Your suffering feels less like a personal affront and more a part of the whole picture of being human. You are more and more aware of the parts of your experience that feel relaxed and open, and so the pain – while sometimes still intense – occurs against a backdrop of feeling basically OK in yourself and in the world.
Guided Audio Meditations
Many people find guided audio meditations helpful in establishing a personal mindfulness practice. Remember, as you try these meditations, that you never have to go anywhere that you do not wish to. It is very helpful to establish a "safe place" before you begin. That way - if you start to have an emotional or physical experience that feels like too much, you can always come back to a sense of safety and stability. For some people, that place might be the breath in the belly; for others, it might be the sensation of their feet in contact with the ground. Some people prefer to establish an external anchor: something you see in the room, a steady, soothing sound. Whatever it is for you, it's super-helpful to practice bringing your attention to rest in a safe place. You can do it anytime - when you're in a conversation that turns upsetting, when you're worried about something, or when you're in pain.
H E R E is a simple, effective practice shared by a Fibromyalgia Shared Medical Appointment participant:
Start by being Here: noticing how your body feels right now
Listen with your Ears: what sounds do you notice?
Then, Relax any unnecessary tension in your body, heart, and mind
Again, listen with your Ears: what sounds do you notice?
You can cycle through these steps as long as you like, using each of the different prompts as tools to bring your awareness back to the present moment in a gentle way.
Once your attention is established in a safe place, you can practice letting in some of what's distressing to you, in very small doses. You might find that you are more resilient than you thought. You might find that things you thought of as completely unmanageable are now describable in other terms. Feel free to use the contact form to ask questions or let me know about your experiences with these practices.
H E R E is a simple, effective practice shared by a Fibromyalgia Shared Medical Appointment participant:
Start by being Here: noticing how your body feels right now
Listen with your Ears: what sounds do you notice?
Then, Relax any unnecessary tension in your body, heart, and mind
Again, listen with your Ears: what sounds do you notice?
You can cycle through these steps as long as you like, using each of the different prompts as tools to bring your awareness back to the present moment in a gentle way.
Once your attention is established in a safe place, you can practice letting in some of what's distressing to you, in very small doses. You might find that you are more resilient than you thought. You might find that things you thought of as completely unmanageable are now describable in other terms. Feel free to use the contact form to ask questions or let me know about your experiences with these practices.
| feat_embodiedwellbeing_meditation_dec2016.mp3 |
Here are some more online meditation resources:
- The UCLA MARC meditation pages include a variety of free, short (3 to 19 minutes long) guided meditations that you can experiment with.
- The NY Times Well section has published a beautiful online guide to meditation, including free guided audio meditations, descriptions, and much more.
- You may be interested in taking a Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction or Mindfulness Based Cognitive Tools class. These clinically-proven model for building mindfulness skills and improving quality of life is offered through many hospitals and health centers, including the Women’s Health Resource Center in Lebanon.
- DHMC and many other healthcare centers offer classes in the Stanford Healthy Living program. These can be really helpful in learning to manage your symptoms and take charge of your life. Here's an article about someone living with fibromyalgia who benefited from this program.
- Many people find the Headspace and Calm apps helpful in learning how to practice mindfulness. You can use them for free (or sign up for paid subscription) to listen to guided audio meditations, and to help remind you of when to practice.
- This beautiful personal essay by Zen teacher Julie Nelson reflects on how meditation practice helps her be kindly with her own experience of illness.
- Free sleep/relaxation meditations in the Google Play store.